I’m on a spiral. Might as well enjoy some vintage Freddie Prinze Jr. in the meantime.

The way he looks at her, man. It’s giving me all sorts of feels.


Nothing like your toddler punching you in the face to wrap up a pretty tough week.


Done

I’m ready to crawl into bed and sleep for a couple days or go to the beach and stare at the ocean until I go cross eyed or (if I was still into that thing) drink/smoke myself into oblivion.

I hate feeling this exposed, out in the open. I want to shut all the doors in my head again. My first therapy appointment went well. She’s very kind but knows her stuff. We have a plan. I’m going to get a physical/blood work, meet with a dietician and a psychiatrist. I think we’re a good fit and she’s already pointed some things out to me.

But, I hate crying. I hate admitting to participating in behaviors that I logically know are dangerous. I hate someone seeing me like that and I most definitely hate feeling like that.

I’ll be fine tomorrow. The feelings that I’ve been trying to swallow for so many months are just eating me up today.


sarkastickunt:

heatherwanderer:

watch this video

no seriously

WATCH IT

This is my theme song. Listen to it. Thank me later.


hershyscorner I totally understand. Unfortunately, I’m at a place where I have to take the jump, slough through the nastiness to get to the good stuff (the help and coping skills I need). Good luck! It’s not an easy decision to make. 

Thanks, totaldrivel!

hershyscorner I totally understand. Unfortunately, I’m at a place where I have to take the jump, slough through the nastiness to get to the good stuff (the help and coping skills I need). Good luck! It’s not an easy decision to make.

Thanks, totaldrivel!


First Day of Therapy

I have my first therapy appointment today with a new therapist. I hate these intro sessions. It’s all about filling them in on my extensive mental health history, rehashing the bad stuff, going over my very dysfunctional family tree and in the end, I end up having to pull off those scabs and not get any closure or real solutions to the problems when the hour is over.

I’m feeling raw and vulnerable just thinking about it.


Ugh gross

Just realized that the cute, buff guy in my 5:30am cycle class taught me in high school.

Yuck.


Gotta love it

Tea party in-law posts fake “news” article on Facebook about how the National Democrat Party is renaming itself to the National Socialist Party.

I point out that it is satire. In-law says, “you’ll see when it comes true!!!!”

Ugh. He’s definitely the kind to post “news” and say, “wake up sheeple!!!!!11!!”

Not gonna win this one. *eyeroll*


Personal Space

We might have a problem. D isn’t really affectionate. He’s not the cuddly type since he’s always running around.

But today at Gymboree, I told him to say sorry to a little girl for accidentally running into her and he leaned over and gave her a kiss on the cheek. We’re already going to have to start the “personal space” talks. 😳